Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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