so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
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