i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
