were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
