dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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