he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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