i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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