if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
