just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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