Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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