It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
