Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Randomize
