it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize