shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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