any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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