He is such a slut. More and more my type.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
