Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I'm sobbing to NWA
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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