You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
