no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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