I showed him my bush... on skype.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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