i jhust puked up my retainher.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize