another moral hangover. fuck.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
