found the other keg... it's in the tree
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Randomize
