So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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