eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
