Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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