what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
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All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
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is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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