Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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