Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Randomize
