Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
