Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
