things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
