I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.