Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
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