therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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