What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
