Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize
