Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize