Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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