Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
