Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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