Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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