my mouth tastes like poor choices
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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