have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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