He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
