I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
