Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
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