You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize
