u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I just found a bag of teeth...
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
