My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize