She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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