Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
